Order up- Originally posted by Adam Langley

The bloke in front of me is messing about with his mate. He looks sporty; in his tracksuit bottoms and white t-shirt, it’s easy to imagine him running around…I dunno, a football pitch or… something that involves a lot of running and shoving. His friend is this huge black guy in a blue jacket. I can just about make out his laugh through my headphones-it’s a surprisingly high-pitched bark. Hmm. Is that racist, thinking that he should have a deep voice because he is big and black? I don’t think its racist. Hope it’s not racist. 10:52 now. Dear Christ, hurry up. Just ahead of the two lads, I can make out the blonde girl in the cream jumper-who spent ages hemming and hawing about the sort of bread she wanted, I mean God, what the hell does it matter how many carbs a sandwich has, brown bread it’s healthy, white bread it’s not healthy, how difficult?-take the small white packet with her sandwich from the woman behind the counter and stroll off, reaching into her handbag as she does so. Getting some money out probably…oh hell, I forgot to pick up any change when I went out this morning, now I’m going to have to pay with the one twenty quid note I have left on me, which means another trip to the cash point. That’s all I bloody need. 10:53. Could I get my sandwich and get to my lecture in seven minutes? Probably could, not to worry, it’s a big room, no-one would notice… OH FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, it’s not rocket science, you cannot have cheese with turkey! Why are you making an issue out of it, even your mate is looking at you like you’re a special case, just have something else….thank you. Ham and Cheese. Simple. No, no don’t ask for it to be toasted….thanks. Are you sure, for the extra Quid? Of course you aren’t, you may need to think about this! But wait,, you’ve decided not to. That was quick, well done. 10:55. He takes his sandwich and goes. Finally, it’s my turn. Now…what do I have?